Family

Family?

Before the judgments flow through the minds of anyone, let me state that family is supposed to be the most important foundation in our lives and yet I find it hard to say I care about some of my family.

Our relatives are our blood, through thick and thin? I think not. Just because someone shares my DNA does not in any way make them family. I think so many people forget this. Some have these strong values about family being everything, and I would agree. But a lot of the time people forget that family is a title earned not a rightful title given at birth.

I can accept the fact that there are blood relations that I do not love, and simply don't have a care for them for one reason or another. I've been given opposition to this from people saying that I am morally wrong for thinking that, and family is the only thing we can count on.

But what do you do when your family has proven to you time and time again that they cannot be counted on? Betrayal, lies, and heartache are not the characteristics I choose to associate with family. Instead of yearning for a side of the family to behave like decent humans, I found my replacement. I found my family among friends as well as certain areas of my gene pool.

I chose to make a family I could count on. Blood is simply a fact of a DNA connection . Family is what is felt in the heart. The ones you would turn to before anyone else. When I realized I would go to certain people before I would go to some of my family I knew that family was a matter of choice.

You can't choose the family you are born into, but you can choose who you consider family. My grandma once told me that saying some blood relatives are not family is like saying she was not my family. When in fact that is completely wrong because she has been like a mother to me.

Family is supposed to be your rock, support, shoulder, etc. When you have an undeniable love for someone, a love that you know you would die for, that is when you know you have family.

If family is everything, then I want my everything to be exactly what I choose to feel as family. Not this preconceived idea that anyone who shares my DNA comes first and foremost